‘Live and let live’ is a policy instilled in us by our parents, and grandparents, which underlined the ethos of ‘minding our own business’ and letting folks do whatever floats their boat. Our opinions are our own, and as my grandmother Erin Don Carolis would say with an arched eyebrow, “darling let them dig their own graves.” Many a time now, I watch so many people who seem to be re-enacting the scene of the dwarves from ‘Snow White,’ with shovels hoisted on their shoulders, determined to go out and dig their own deepest of deep graves! Dig away I say, and do, at the same time, give us hilarious fodder for entertainment as well.
It could be my age, or it could be that I was ‘an old soul’ at birth, and never had the patience or energy to suffer fools, and deal with nonsense. Whatever the reason, I am not inclined to participate in the ‘cheering on’ of maddeningly asinine behavior, from anyone. I do have the ‘sense and sensibility’ to just watch from the periphery, and then end up sitting at home with family and laugh uncontrollably at what we have seen. Naughty? Why yes, very much so.
One particular point which amuses and in turn can irritate, is the ridiculous notion that people think they can ‘pull the wool’ over anyone’s eyes forever and ever, amen. This is one area where men and women try their hands, and other body parts, at dalliances and usually end up in the midst of an embarrassing fracas. We have the forgivable foibles of youth, where those who feel infallible, and are bestowed with the brashness that comes with being young, wanting to ‘dip their toes,’ and again, other body parts, into every available pool. This is, as I said somewhat forgivable because a strong dose of naiveté plays a part here, where these ‘young ones’ firmly hold the thought that they are ‘players’ and that if they find those who are ‘ready, willing and able’ they would simply ‘play the game’. The reason I say these ‘antics of youth’ are perhaps forgivable, is that in most cases they are immature beyond belief and rather than malice and mal intent, it is simply raging hormones that get the better of them. Also, at this stage of life, most of their own ‘entanglements’ are in relationships where they are still finding their way, and are not nearly, or really fully committed.
Of course, being young does not mean that the dramatics and theatrics are any less. The ‘serial daters’ like the ‘serial’ anything, leave a series of issues in their wake, as they ‘poke their way’ through life. Gal pals, and guy pals, girlfriends, and boyfriends, fiancés and fiancées are all apt at taking offense when their ‘other’ decides to ‘sample the goods’ outside of their equations. This usually results in tantrums and tears and can also escalate into further dramatics that usually can be settled with a well-placed apology, and a promise of ‘not doing it again’. Let me reiterate that in ‘youth’ one has a tendency to see things through extraordinarily rose-tinted lenses, and thus are more inclined to, as Cher’s song said, “Believe.” This is the innocence of youth! So as the young one’s yo-yo to between all and sundry, we as those of a much more mature vintage sit back, smile, and wish them ‘happy trails’ on their paths to whoever they get to next.
The shock horror and ultimate amusement of the devious dalliances usually takes place when those who should have the benefits of maturity, as their guiding beacon, behave like teenagers in their first bloom of ‘crushing’. I know age is but a number, I know that we should live laugh and love to the grave, but the plus of getting older, is that we should also benefit, and make use of the wonderful catalog of experiences, that entitles us to make more intelligent, and effective decisions. This is, at least, the hope we have for all of us. Unfortunately, though, this is, in many cases, just ‘hope.’
We see men and women swirling and twirling, behaving in the most amusing manner as they channel their inner faded ‘Geisha’ and wannabe ‘Samurai’. They preen and puff, attempting to get, hold on to, and ultimately cling to the attention of some paramour, who can be half their age, or alternately is already taken. The ladies twitter and chatter excitedly with each other like attention starved women of the Zenana quarters of a princely court, plotting and planning to catch a glimpse, catch a moment or catch a disease from their latest ‘Loin Interest.’ We all love our excitements, but when their need for attention ends up either rocking or wrecking someone else’s relationship, or alternately ends up with howling and wailing in an embarrassing show of self-pity, this is found slightly baffling and aggravating.
Alternately we see the brash bravado of the men who imagine that having a bit of cash entitles them to pull a “Benjamin Button” and start reverse aging, as they flirt with every skirt that shows them the slightest attention. Flirting aside, they also imagine that sending over drinks to girls who are the age of their daughters and granddaughters, speaking in the loudest possible voices about their latest financial conquests and acquisitions, and dressing like a bad caricature of a Kollywood hero, would get them some ‘action.’ Of course, there are the ‘mercenary minded mares’ who would happily drop their lingerie at the mere mention of a handbag or a weekend getaway, but those are just courtesans who have no court to ‘operate’ in. These poor deluded men actually think that these wanton women are with them for their ‘good-looks and charm.’ Even while overlooking the frighteningly tight clothes worn by both sexes while screaming for attention, the behavior is what truly induces nausea. With paunchy mid-sections swinging in the breeze these wannabe teens, try their hardest to believe that their misguided attentions are harmless, and simply their right to have fun. Harmless it could be until their spouses massacre them in public, verbally and otherwise, on the way to divorce court!
Keeping in mind the many shenanigans that we have all witnessed, amusements aside, it is sad to see those who refuse to evolve to the next chapter of their lives. How wonderful to have family and friends who care and appreciate, how awesome to have fulfilling careers and lives, and how splendid to be able to go out, have fun, and go home, knowing that one is ‘centered’ in every way. Too much to ask? Not at all. Let us work on ourselves and keep in mind that each day is a new day, and the beginning of our becoming and being the better and best versions of ourselves. Leave the fabulous foibles of nonsensical drama to those who are still finding their way and let us enjoy being the focus of our own eternally evolving lives.