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Sarath Sri Bhaggiyadatta A friend, confidante and second father

24 Mar 2020 - {{hitsCtrl.values.hits}}      

I have known Uncle Sarath (1948 - 2020) my entire life. He and Aunty Tania were my parents’ closest friends. Uncle Sarath and my father, Sam sang together in the infamous St. Paul’s Milagiriya choir! My father has shared many stories of the three musketeers, Uncle Sarath, Uncle Chuck and my father getting up to mischief and various escapades growing up.
My earliest memories of Uncle Sarath are from when my family visited Canada in 1987 and we stayed with him and Aunty Tania. I remember them driving us all over the country and in particular our trip to Niagara Falls.
We had had a busy day and lunch was quite late by which time we were all famished. We ordered some hamburgers and when they finally came we all gulped them down! I recall Uncle Sarath saying “What men you’ll ate those like 
eating buth (rice)!”.
My father and he shared a close friendship. Uncle Sarath stood out for many reasons one of them being his significant stutter. My father would often refer to him as “the stammerer” extremely politically incorrect but such was their friendship!
No pretences and as real as it gets! It is almost ironic that my chosen profession was speech therapy! My father would often tell me my ultimate test was to “cure” Uncle Sarath’s stammer! Never succeeded in doing this!

 

 

"Uncle Sarath had strong faith in God. ..He is in a better place looking down on us with a cheeky smile and a twinkle in his eye "


Early on I knew Uncle Sarath only as a friend of my parents, but later as I grew up and became an adult I came to know him as a friend, confidante and father figure. My fondest memories of Uncle Sarath were from when I was doing my Master’s at Bowling Green, Ohio. I would often drive to Toronto with my friend Kate. I would spend 3-4 days in Toronto and enjoy Aunty Tania’s TLC (tender loving care), delicious food and of course Uncle Sarath’s alcohol!
constant complaint to my parents was that my visits always left his reserves of alcohol dry and his bank account empty! I recall how the three of us would spend many evenings chatting and laughing until late into the night. His jokes, many politically incorrect (of course!) and sometimes so silly, would leave me in stitches!
Uncle Sarath was a man of many qualities. He was naturally funny, generous, hard-working and compassionate. I remember seeing Uncle Sarath in the Spring while it was still cold outside working in the garden. This wasn’t easy work but you couldn’t stop him. His garden was something he was proud of. He was also passionate about cricket. He initially started a cricket club called the “Nomads.” Later joining the Yorkcricket club.
I remember going to watch some of the games and thinking that Uncle Sarath must be in good shape to be wicket-keeping at his age squatting at the crease for so long! I have gone on many walks with him while visiting Toronto. I remember being out of breath trying to keep up to the rapid pace at which he walked! He would call out “Good morning” to strangers as we walked. While visiting Sri Lanka he would go on his daily walks and would do the same, calling out “Good morning”, and scaring the poor, unsuspecting people walking on the road!
Uncle Sarath had a great work ethic. He would share how his early life in Canada was not easy. Starting off distributing mail at the Scotiabank to then slowly rise the ranks. Uncle Sarath shared advice with me on relationships and marriage. He would often say what a gem Aunty Tania was to put up with him! He would refer to her as “Jesus’s first cousin!” probably for this very fact!

 

 

"It is almost ironic...my profession was speech therapy! My father would often tell me my ultimate test was to ‘cure’ Uncle Sarath’s stammer! Never succeeded in doing this..."


Uncle Sarath and Aunty Tania have visited me in every place I have lived in the US. From Bowling Green to Atlanta, to Penn State and finally to Boston! They have truly been my parents away from home. It was such a joy that they got to meet Fonny (my now husband) when they visited me in Atlanta and when Fonny and I drove to Toronto. Uncle Sarath always managed to find humour in every situation. When they visited us in Atlanta we were on our way to spend the day at a waterfall and Fonny was quite lost!
When we asked him how long more his answer was “only 5 minutes away.” We were driving for quite a while before we finally found our way! Needless to say, Uncle Sarath never let him live this one down!
It is hard to imagine that he is gone. He was a little man with a larger than life personality. He was usually the life of the party. His stammer never stopped him from talking even if it caused a slight delay in delivering the punch line of his jokes! I can still hear his jokes in my head and the famous line he would tell me “you are academically smart but when it comes to real-life it is another matter!” It makes me sad that he never got to meet my daughter Tarini, to whom he would have been a second Seeya.
He would have been just thrilled with her. Uncle Sarath had a strong faith in God. I know that he is in a better place looking down on us with a cheeky smile and a twinkle in his eye. 
You will forever be missed. Thank you for being a wonderful friend to my family and a second father to me.

-Nimisha Muttiah